Qualified for the job ?

Poor old Bobby Robson got the sack from Newcastle FC this week.

My favourite moment of the story was when Sky Sports News got an exclusive interview with him but accidentally sent their worst reporter.

Sir Bobby was rambling on about being black & white through and through and being back on the terraces next week etc etc. Every so often he would pause, waiting for a question. But no question would come. The Sky reporter clearly couldn't think of anything to ask.

Bobby would then say "well that's all I've got to say" before repeating all the same stuff about being black and white through and through.

Personally I thought we had become stuck in a permanent TV loop with an incapable interviewer and an incoherent/ emotional / alzheimer ex-football manager. Luckily they cut to the studio.

Former Newcastle player Paul Gascoigne is cheerleading for Alan Shearer to get the job saying: "Personally I'd go for Shearer. He knows the game."

Gascoigne added: "Give the lad a go. I've seen him on TV talking about it.

yes Gazza.

Don't say fuck or bugger

Gordon Ramsay has been criticised by TV watchdog Ofcom for saying f**king Jesus on the TV show Hells Kitchen. Apparently you can say f**king but using the word in conjunction with "Jesus" breached their guidelines. I'd have thought Jesus could look after himself but I'm sure he's delighted Ofcom are looking out for him.

Veggies will be happy to hear that the fact that Ramsay killed a lobster live on telly, did not breach any guidelines at all. Ofcom did not uphold the 5 complaints about that.

The question is - how many would have complained if he'd killed contestants Edwina Currie or Matt Goss ?

Vote now

Homeless Hearts

I think that every business studies student should be made to study Scottish football. It is a perfect case study in how to completely destroy a business, alienate your customer base and lose any competitiveness you once had.

Take Hearts, for example - and Cala Homes are about to do just that - they give case study 1. Discuss: How does a Chief Executive who trades his way to a near £20 million debt keep his job ? How does selling off your only asset to pay your debts, when you will just have to go into debt to build a replacement, do any good at all.

Case study 2 could come from Inverness. Discuss: What is the business/ moral/ environmental argument for making a club with a perfectly adequate stadium, play 100 miles away in Aberdeen ?

I could go on, and on, and on

Olympic intimidation

How do people get so fit ? I've watched athletes doing somersaults from diving boards that I'd need valium just to climb; gymnasts doing so many backflips that I have lost count and beach volleyball that.. well, I've just been watching that without comment.

All of this has left me feeling a bit fat and old. Apparently the Olympics are a great motivator to get people out and active. It seems to have the opposite effect on me. These people are just too fit and healthy to make me want to emulate them. Bet I could drink them under the table tho.

It's back ! Be afraid

In a moment of madness, the Scottish Premier League sold the TV highlights package to STV. That means one thing, Scotsport is back.

No expense has been spent on their exciting set which included some novelty goalposts, some posters of the back page of the Daily Record and a studio audience who look like they're held at gunpoint.

Jim Delahunt continues to front it (even Jim White managed to get a job at Sky) and he is accompanied by the oddly named Sarah O who sports significant cleavage and, apparently, a back problem which involves her leaning forward at a very odd angle while standing in front of a TV screen.

And they dug him up. Archie Mcpherson is still doing commentary. Once again, you can hear him read stuff out in his inimitable style. Best quote so far "A crazy save is as good as a fine save anyday" What ???

And another thing !

Did you see the furore in the papers earlier in the week about the killer of Stefan Pakeerah being obsessed by the game Manhunt and that it had inspired the killing.

Dixons and Game stopped stocking it, Radio 5 had umpteen phone-ins and MPs phoned in from their holidays to call for something to be done.

Well it now transpires that the Police found the game in the bedroom of the victim, not the killer. They state: "Leicestershire Constabulary stands by its response that police investigations did not uncover any connections to the video game, the motive for the incident was robbery".

Obviously the poor sod is still dead and the other chap a worthless killer but where are the phone-ins and screaming headlines to say er actually we got this wrong ? I'm sure the game designers have a good case for suing the pants off the so called moral guardians.

Little bit of politics

BBC Online has an article today about political websites and political blogs in particular. You can read it at http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/3530938.stm

My personal favourite is probably the blog of Austin Mitchell MP which certainly pulls no punches about a certain Mr T Blair. Comments include: "I’ve been to Santa Monica to register as an elector in the US so I can have a vote on British foreign policy." and "President Bush flew onto an aircraft carrier in bomber jacket to declare the Iraq War over. Tony goes to City banquets in his stuffed shirt to declare the class war over."

He is at: http://www.austinmitchell.org/

Festival watch

The Fringe and Festival are just getting underway in Edinburgh - it now takes twice as long to get anywhere and every flat surface is flyposted. Yes, yes I know the tourists bring in lots of cash and the festival gives the city a fantastic atmosphere but that's no excuse for getting in my bloody way when I'm trying to reach Boots for my mealdeal...

Todays Totals:
Number of times I was asked for directions: 1
Number of leaflets thrust in my direction: 7
Number of tourist photos I managed to get in the way of: 4

Isn't France brilliant ?

Not long back from a week in France. Highlights included touring about in a little hired Citroen which threw itself around the Alps with a shrug and a few whines & sitting watching the sun go down while drinking bottles of wine that cost about a pound-fifty.

Top three reasons why I want to move to France:
1) It is cheaper in France to buy a bottle of wine than a bottle of Coke.
2) Croissants, Pain au Chocolat, baguettes (never the same if bought in Tesco and not Leclerc or Intermarche)
3) In a week long tour, we did not see an ugly woman. I think the French have been secretly genetically modifying their female population to ensure they are all beautiful. Either that, or they've been sending the mingers to live in Paisley...

Excuses, excuses

Well, it's been a little while since I posted anything and no, i don't feel guilty. Firstly, cos I doubt anyone reads it. Secondly, because I have been on holiday - about which, more in a future post and thirdly cos it gives my sister something to harass me about.